SINGAPORE: An anonymous confession circulating on the SGWhispers platform has sparked mixed reactions online, after a Malaysian woman detailed what she described as a prolonged period of deception, emotional manipulation, and coercion in a relationship with a Singaporean man who turned out to be married.
In the post, the woman recounted how the relationship began in September 2024 after the two became acquainted through work and later connected at a company dinner. She described herself as a private individual who chose to keep the relationship low-key, believing it to be mutual. She claims that it was only later that she found out that the relationship had been built on falsehoods from the outset.
The woman said she became pregnant for the first time in December 2024, just three months into the relationship. She claimed the man persuaded her to terminate the pregnancy, citing the newness of their relationship and the timing. Trusting his assurances, she agreed, describing the experience as both physically and emotionally painful.
Nearly a year later, in September 2025, when she became pregnant for a second time, she said she discovered that the man was already married. She alleged that the man told her his marriage was effectively over, in the process of divorce, and that he had not been intimate with his wife for a decade.
The woman said the man convinced her to undergo a second abortion, arguing it would allow them to build a future together in Singapore.
The promised divorce, however, never materialised.
The relationship continued until February 2026, and when she became pregnant for a third time, she alleged that the man’s behaviour shifted. She claimed that he pressured her to terminate the pregnancy again while issuing threats about potential consequences if she exposed him publicly.
She claimed that he has since ceased all communication, choosing what she described as “silence treatment” while avoiding responsibility.
Reflecting on the relationship, the woman said she came to realise a pattern of control that led her to suffer lasting physical and emotional harm, noting that the experience left her with “three pregnancies, two abortions” and scars that “cannot simply disappear.”
She urged other women to remain vigilant even when someone appears trustworthy or respectable and encouraged those who have experienced similar situations not to remain silent, as “silence will not earn you kindness” and that protecting oneself is never too late.
The confession has since drawn a wide range of reactions online, with commenters offering both support and criticism.
One commenter, Facebook user Megan Chén, pointed to the importance of taking precautions, writing that protection should have been used after the first incident and adding that “all married men who stray use the same storyline.”
Another netizen, Soon Fatt Wang, advised individuals to define what they want upfront, be it a casual or committed relationship, and to look out for signs of transparency, such as being introduced to friends and family or being acknowledged publicly. He also highlighted the importance of protection, calling the lack of it a “huge red flag.”
The Facebook user advised, “Use this as a checklist when getting to know someone new. Do your background checks, be clear about what you want, and make sure he is willing to introduce you properly—family, friends, and even on social media. Most importantly, protect yourself.”
Another commenter, Facebook user Wong Siow Wai, took a more empathetic approach, encouraging the woman to seek professional help, suggesting trauma therapy as a path toward healing.
The commenter wrote, “Seek a trauma therapist to support you. You need deep healing. Don’t be ashamed, guilty, or feel low or have no self-worth. You are still lovable.
“There is a deep underlying cause why you are gullible and want to feel loved badly. You are unloved, unheard and not given a voice by your caregiver, and as such, you attract an unhealthy partner.”
Others adopted a more critical stance. Facebook user Khairul Timothy Lim acknowledged the harm described but argued that the woman also bore some responsibility for her choices, noting that precautions could have been taken and the relationship could have been ended earlier.
Despite this, he concluded by affirming her worth and encouraging her not to give up. He wrote, “I’m sorry that this happened to you, but I also noticed that you don’t appear to be taking responsibility or accountability for what happened as well.
“Precautions could’ve been taken. The relationship could’ve been broken off. You could’ve moved on. But you chose to become pregnant all 3 times; you chose to continue with him 2 times…”
He added, “Despite all that, you are still a valuable human being worthy of love and compassion. Don’t give up. Take care, and I wish you the best.”
